By Nyamwange Ombuna
In 2018, while relaxing with a friend at the restaurant directly facing Carrefour supermarket in Two Rivers Mall, a friend noticed an incredibly beautiful mid-sized lady sitting on one end of the restaurant. When he consulted me, I told him I can get the lady for him ‘amwambie vile anataka’ (so that he tells her what he wants)
Wondering how such a small task is executed, he dared me. I called a waiter and told her to walk over and tell the lady someone was calling her. The waiter did as instructed. Obviously, if someone calls you, first instincts is to check out who it is. Maybe it is someone who knows you.
When the lady responded to the my call, standing next to our table, my friend froze. Words escaped his mouth. To save face, I had to take over and talk. I was short, precise and straight to the point. The bubbly lady gave me her contact details.
The lady was beautiful, very beautiful. I actually told my friend it was not friendly to spoonfeed him and that he would have to wait. If I was rejected, I would send details to him to try his luck. As luck would have it, I was never rejected in the coming months.
Now, I usually advice men to stop camping in women’s inbox like uncultured idiots. If you think a woman is beautiful, go to her inbox and without wasting time, table your manifesto. But then again, social media should not be a primary hunting ground for a serious man. Go out and hunt real women,women you can see with your two eyes and gauge the amount of foundation (ekebuse), makeup, walking style, and meat.
If she looks exactly like your taste, stop her and say, “Madam, I just saw you but I think you might be in a hurry or in some other business and I won’t really want to waste your time. But since I have liked you, kindly give me your number. We shall talk later!”. I can guarantee you the woman will smile and give you her number.